Having children, specially bearing one is not for all women. Women have the biological capacity but it is an open question whether a woman wants it or not. Some however, may be forced to have one in the case of those unplanned pregnancies or of being a rape victim. The question remains though, if the woman actually wants to have children or not.
There are primary reasons why women nowadays do not want to have children, specially those in the first world countries. Regardless if the reasons are acceptable to you or me, it is the truth for others, brought about by how they were brought up by their parents, by the beliefs and cultures in the place where they grew up, or by philosophies in life that they try to live by. Let me give you the 5 top reasons that I am aware of.
- Having children is a huge financial responsibility. Unlike having a dog or a cat, who may live up to 16 years, having children means preparing for the future financially. You do not need to send a pet to college, so it is easier than having kids.
- Bearing children ruins the body figure of a woman. This may sound absurd to you, but for many women these days, in this age of beauty and perfection, this is a big issue. Mothers have sagging bellies and t*ts and nobody wants this. Again you may disagree, but this is reality. You can compare the taut body of a woman who never bore a child and the taut body of a mother who worked out real hard after giving birth and see the subtle differences such as stretch marks. For people who knows how to appreciate the responsibility, efforts, and discipline of a mother to maintain herself, this remarkable difference makes a mother all the more beautiful. However, deep inside the mother’s heart, her body confidence may have gone down 35% lower than before she had a child.
- Having children means changing your lifestyle. You can no longer party and stay out late every night, whenever and wherever you want. Having a child means changing your life and lifestyle forever.
- Children damages womens career. When a woman becomes pregnant, not only is her figure changed, her career options change too. She won’t be sent on overseas assignments anymore, or anything that will pose risks to her and her unborn child. Then she goes on maternity leave for 2 months. After the child is born, she might have to rush home every evening to tend to the child instead of working overtime.
- Children are lifetime responsibilities. That means you have to learn to be more patient, considerate, more loving, and be there for your child or children. You have to be a role model for your child if you want the child to grow up to be someone worthy of praise. This means you have to be more responsible and teach the child well. Being a parent sometimes is the hardest work because it needs psychological, physical, and mental stability. It is not like working 5 days a week, 8 hours a day. You have to be a parent even if you’re sick and unwell.
I do not make excuses for those who do not want to have children, but simply to say I understand and it is your choice. At one point in my life, I was faced with that big decision too.
For the women who chose to be mothers and parents despite knowing all these, my salute goes to you all.
It is unfortunate though that some women who wants to bear children couldn’t have one because of medical conditions, while others who do not want to be mothers are blessed with many unwanted pregnancies. My heart goes out to all those women. May you gain blessings from the Almighty, so you can still share your love to others.
To the women out there, would you still want to have children after knowing all these? Or do you have other better reasons for not wanting kids?
To the husbands, do you now understand how big a sacrifice it is for a woman to bear your child/children? Are you showing your wife the appreciation and love she deserves?
I would love to know your thoughts and comments about this.