Abuse of a parent when I was growing up and grown!

I have been thinking a lot for the last month about things that have happened in the past with my dad, I feel that if I write them and vent that it will help me to come to terms with certain things that have happened in my life and give me what I need to forgive my dad.
It all started after my mom passed and he would yell at me for things that he found that she had done before she died. Later it led to him being emotionally and mentally abusive to me: some of the ways that he did this was to tell me that I was good for nothing and would never amount to anything, and he would treat me like I was dirt under his feet and allowed my sister to do the same thing.
One time when we had been on vacation, we came home and the house was broken into, the front window in the door had been broken out and the people had only stolen meat from the deep freeze. I watched as he took some guns and hid them in the upstairs of our house and then went to the police department to report them stolen! I remember him telling me to keep my mouth shut and he told the cop (which happened to be my uncle) that they had been stolen. I was only 7-8 at the time, so did as I was told.
Not long after that, he told my sister and I to get all of the things that we wanted to keep and take to the house next door. I again did as I was told and moved my things! Not long after that he started a fire that looked as though it was an electrical fire, he woke my sister up and told her to get out of the house. The thought that he was trying to carry out was to leave me in the house and let it burn, the only thing that he hadn’t thought of was that my sister wouldn’t leave until I was with her to go. The cop that showed up that day was my grandfather and he questioned us girls, my sister told him about him trying to leave me in there but her making him get me to go with her. Now, that I think back at it, I knew that something was going to happen because of getting things out weeks before!
Later, he didn’t like the man that I chose to marry and spend the rest of my life with. He would try and control everything and tell us how lazy we were and how we weren’t going to last. He also thought that he could tell me who I could and couldn’t have as friends and how to raise my kids. He tried to get me to do what he got my sister to do, that was get rid of the father of my kids and let him help me raise them and take care of them. My sister did this and she got bailed out of anything that she ever did wrong and she and her daughter didn’t have to worry about paying bills or anything because he always did it for them. They never wanted for anything because he would get them whatever they wanted.
He also told my son at 3 years old that he was going to shoot his dad and even showed him the gun he would use. He would sit there and so would my sister and tell my kids all how bad of parents we were and that we wouldn’t get them what they needed and that we weren’t fit to be parents.
It is very hard even after he has been gone for a month to forgive him for all of the things that he did to me and my family! I just had to get this all off my chest so that I can put things in perspective.
Thank you for reading and putting up with all of the things that I have written here.


    1. Gil Camporazo

      In our country, abusive parents are penalized by law. Our local Department of Social Welfare is running after for that kind of parents. DSW is filing a case against them.

    1. Gil Camporazo

      This is the usual idea of those children who are being raised in a rich family. They never bother to prepare for their future for they are too dependent from their parents who so wealthy. But they are not exempted from being despondent or miserable if they fail in their lives.

  1. Sandy KS

    I am sorry you went through that. I too have destruction family members. One such sister i finally put y foot down and said no more abuse. Do not talk to me ever again. I am happier this way. I avoid her at all cost. I refuse to go to any family gatherings if I know she is there, just to avoid her. From what I understand karma is kicking her behind right now.

  2. Sharon Epperson Post author

    Thank you @Sandy KS, I am doing the same thing! I am getting rid of my sister and her daughter out of my life, they are very very abusive to me. They learned well from my dad and they are as bad if not worse than he was.
    I don’t understand how they can be that way to their own flesh and blood!!

  3. Donna

    You have God, your family and of course me that loves you now I know it was hard to forgive but now you begin a new life my friend

  4. Gil Camporazo

    I have written something about forgiving. This thing is very hard to do for a person who has been maltreated and put to shame before the public. But if anyone has to harbor grudges and possesses the unforgiving attitude, he won’t be living in harmony and he won’t be in peace. To forgive and to forget could bring peace within and pave the way to a brighter future.

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