Anger is an emotional response when you are dealing with problems and some provocation. There are different reason why people get angry. It is a first response over an accumulated unfair situations and some situations that really are unforgiving. Being angry is also a response so that the other party will stop doing something we don’t like, something we hate. Sometimes it is a response to end something and it would bring us peace.
Maybe the description above is a deeper meaning of anger but let us say that being angry will never help you with decision if you apply it immediately. In this blog I want to share to you some tips on how to avoid anger in a frustrating situation. Take note that this is from personal experience so if some of the reason will not be applicable to you, don’t apply.
First, there is a situation that really makes us feel angry instantly. It it when we get frustrated that we have nothing to do about it now since it already happened and we are just there too know whole story. My response to this one is to calm down. Yes, I might get angry, I might slam a door or slam a thing on the floor, but I will calm down and think of better things to do about it. I even count 1 to 10 before responding. I breathe in and out before while counting and oxygen really helps me to have a better decision.
Second, if you feel bad about the things that will make you angry after a second, I go away. I keep myself locked in my bedroom. I don’t want to listen to people. I let myself alone in a room. I am not avoiding to solve the situation, but keeping myself from people will help me focus on thinking. It also calms down my nerves because when I am angry, I can feel my shoulder shaking. It means there is a building anger inside me.
Third, I drink water. Actually, sometimes, in the middle of argument I drink water. Why? It is because when we don’t have oxygen in our brain, it makes us a shallow thinker. When a shallow thinker deals with problems they usually respond with urgency with situations that brings them to danger. Oxygen in the water will help us to focus. We might even discover there is nothing to be angry about, that everything can be solved without even shouting at each other.
Fourth, I massaged my hand. When someone is talking to me and provoking me to fight because they are angry with me, I massage my hand. I just hold my hand tightly and I repeat it. A psychiatrist told me that it helps the blood to flows in my brain. It lessens the emotional side and brings me to focus. It even makes your hand ready for slapping, lol, but yes, massaging it makes it flexible for slapping to prepare you for physical attack. However, we are solving the issue here so making your blood flow freely in your veins makes you more focus to answer the person who is provoking in a manner that you not look like stupid.
Fifth, when you feel you are getting angry in an instant. Slam your hands on the wall. I do that most of the time. It is much better to hurt your hands, than to hurt someone else. The pain will shake the idea of attacking another person. It will even help you to awaken your nerves and stop you from attacking someone because you are dealing with your own pains. However, this is not the same as when the other party wants to hurt you. You don’t slam your hand on the wall then response to other person, of course, you defend yourself immediately.
Those things above are the ones that could help me to survive whenever I am angry. It makes a person on the right side, not on the wrong side. It avoid me to being shallow but it helps me to be open-minded with some situations. It might not be applicable on some, but it would help.
Image credit to https://pixabay.com/en/man-male-angry-face-expression-921004/