I have one daughter. Her name is Alessandra Nadine. What a nice name, right?Two weeks ago, she’d been telling me something. She told me that it’s her big problem that made her cry. She thought, its her fault. She was confused.
As a mother who work far from her, I always tell her to tell me the whole truth so that I can advise her/ Eventhough, she lives with my Mother, I don’t like her to reveal her problems to her.
Through facebook, we communicated and I understand the whole idea. She felt alone and insecure. she felt that her classmates didn’t like her. They were not asking her to come to them when they go to the mall. It seems she is an outcast. After class, she is alone going home and the only one bestfriend she got in high school is with someone.
Her best friend found another group and another girl is gossiping against her. She was named as “bad friend.” It hurts here a lot because she is not that type. yes, maybe she didn’t come to their hang -outs at night because it’s a big NO! from me. By 6 pm , she must be inside the house. She felt she is always alone.
Another thing, is the Facebook thing. She idolized Kpop girls. Her profile pic is the Kpop girls, and all her pictures there are all Kpop Girls. You cannot see her face there. She is comparing herself to others. While watching her classmates FB account, she felt that they are happy because they are posting their moments together. While she has no pictures like those her friends. She said, it seems she is different and weird.
Here is the advise of me (the Mother Adviser).First, she must go with them. If they are going to the mall, then come with them. But don’t do what they are doing like drinking or flirting. (Do you think she will not do that if she will mingle with her classmates? Who knows?) Come home before 6pm so that she will not creating problems with my Mother who is very strict with the time. Create another FB account and post all your picture from your phone. She has no personal pictures on her phone. All Kpop. (hahahaha addict!)
No problem, Mommy likes pictures. I will send it to her. I thought the problem was solved. The next day, she talked to me again. She said, that she was crying and asked the advise of my Mother. Here is her advise. Why crying for nonsense? That is not even a problem. You are in school to learn and finish your study so that you have a job in the future. See, how practical and heartless the advise hahahaha.Well, my Mom is right. It’s a nonsense but you cannot ignor the feeling of a seventeen young lady concern of her feelings and pressure she felt.
So here I am again, the Mother Adviser. If you come with your classmates, will you be happy? If you don’t post Kpop, will you be sad?She don’t like to go where her classmates go.She don’t like their activities and the way they behave with the boys. (Good news: She has no boyfriend yet. haahha)She is happy with Kpop pictures. She doesn’t know what she will feel if she cannot see the Kpop girls on her facebook. So, dear friends, where the problem lies?
If you are the mother of this seventeen year old child, what advise will you give to her to ease that feeling of insecurity and weakness?
Photo Credit: Picture of Nadine