Is There Such a Thing as Low Emotional Intelligence

Sometimes our emotions get the best of us and we know it and sometimes we think our behavior is in line with logic and reason; but, really our emotions are taking over. Clinicians rate humans on what they call their emotional intelligence.


According to, having low emotional intelligence may be even detrimental than having low intelligence.  The reason being is it can affect all aspects of our lives. It can ruin our social relationships, with coworkers, friends, acquaintances, and so on. For example, look at the arguments you have had with different people and how they affected you emotionally and how they consequently affected your life. Though some people are very good with people other people can lack the emotion skills to handle certain social situations.


Signs of low emotional intelligence  


Being too argumentative


Have you noticed that some people just seem to argue all the time and this causes friction and bad feelings.


Inability to understand others


These people do not understand how other people are feeling, and they are often annoyed when their family or friends want them to acknowledge hurt feelings and so on.


Lack of empathy


This sign of low emotional intelligence goes hand in hand with not understanding others.  These people are incapable of empathy.  They just cannot understand how others are feelings.  For example, they might tell their friend to “just get over it,” or to, stop making such a big fuss over the death of your cat, it was just a stupid animal.”


Thinking other people need to loosen up.  


These people can make crude jokes or say inappropriate things and blame the target party for being overly sensitive; “it was just a joke,” “take it easy,” “whoa where did that outburst come from?” and so on.


These people might find situations funny when they really are not. For example, laughing at someone who has fallen and hurt themselves, laughing at fat people or handicapped people and so on.


Not being able to accept another’s point of view.  


Another sign of low emotional intelligence is trying to be right all the time even when the evidence points in the opposite direction, getting mad when others don’t share their view, and being unable to accept constructive criticism.


Blaming others


We all know people who blame others for everything that goes wrong in their lives, they do not take responsibility for anything.  They are never at fault it is always the other person who was wrong.


Hiding emotions and walking away


These people often hid their true emotions in order to protect themselves; however, it could lead to misunderstandings and it also gives the wrong impression of who they really are.


In addition, they tend to walk away from emotional situations they can’t handle, for example if a lover says he or she loves them, someone is crying, someone needs emotional support and so on.


Sudden outbursts


These people have a hard time to handle situations and sometimes they display and outburst that is inappropriate to the situation at hand.  They often leave the receiving party bewildered, hurt, or angry.   


Difficulty maintaining friendships
According to Kendra Cherry writing for, “Because low IQ people often come off as abrasive and unfeeling, they have difficulty maintaining friendships. Close friendships require a mutual give-and-take, sharing of emotions, compassion, and emotional support, all of which low EQ individuals struggle with.”


  1. grace

    In the good old days everything was based on IQ and that included recruiting. Those who scored high passing all those quiz tests were thought to be great material. How wrong they were.
    Whatever you have listed is so important to be successful in this world.
    We have a niece in our family with average IQ but she is the richest having businesses all over. Surely this is due to her high EQ level.
    Yes. There is what is called low EQ.

    1. Carol Roach Post author

      Getting along with people and having good emotional stability is really important your niece is a good example of that

  2. Sandy KS

    Yes, I do believe their is low intelligence. As I know my daughter has it. I do think she lacks empathy. As it is harder for her to understand others feelings. My teen son is the opposite with a higher intelligence. Where he takes honor classes in high school.

    They each learn in their own way.

    1. Carol Roach Post author

      okay just to clarify intelligence is how smart you are in certain areas, but emotional intelligence is how good you are managing your emotions and dealing with other people while managing your emotions.

    2. Sandy KS

      Both of my teens have been tested. My daughter has an IQ of a nine year old. She will be turning 16 in a week. My son has a very high IQ.

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